Professor Layton and the Negligence Allegations

WARNING! CAUTION! AVISO! This post contains spoilers for both Professor Layton games. Of course, if you’re the type who actually cares about having Layton games spoiled you are almost assuredly playing them for the wrong reason. And if you played the games without guessing the spoiled bits on your own you’re probably not smart enough […]

How to fix Scribblenauts.

Scribblenauts is the most fun game you’ll ever scream obscenities at and ragequit in utter frustration. As a toy it’s one of the most charming, pleasurable experiences on the DS. As a game it’s clunky controls and janky, illogically physics as far as the eye can see.

My original assessment was that this was inescapable […]

Weird?

Peanut took her brother to a Blink 182 concert last night and, upon returning, reported a massive 20+ car pile-up on the Howard Frankland bridge. Her theory was the pile-up was caused by a combination of wet conditions and inebriated drivers fresh off yesterday’s Bucs game. I figured I could make a good update out […]

Survivor: Samoa, week two

Officer Betsy might be a good judge of character, but that’s only half the battle in Survivor. The other half, of course, is convincing everyone else you’re right. Unfortunately for Officer Betsy, the only move in her arsenal is nagging everyone to death, so she got voted off tonight.

Whoops, did I spoil that […]

Special rules for special people.

From 2005 to 2008 I maintained a blog about my experiences working in the drug test industry. Every Saturday I revive one of those experiences here. The following was originally posted June 30, 2006.

Special rules for special people. I said I was going to update yesterday, and I didn’t, and I’m glad […]

monopoly

Like everyone else on the internet, I once teamed up with an artist to make a webcomic. It didn’t get very far, but I’ll share one here each Friday until there aren’t anymore. Enjoy.

The only possible title for this is “The Case of the Missing Rain”

This was whipped up today during my downtime at work. It’s the result of precisely zero research, editing or revision and I have absolutely no idea where I could possibly go with it.

Jocelyn could see every grain of wood, every knot of rigging. Every detail made sense, and the ones that didn’t she pieced […]

14 Lines That Will Never, Ever Be Said In A Serious Context

They say you can find the humor in anything. But can you find the serious in anything? Here are fourteen lines I’m pretty sure are impossible to use in a non-comedic context.

#1: “I’m not sure why the Army requisitioned 25,000 giant rubber band balls.”

#2: “See this? This is my Cannibals Annonymous 24-hour chip.”

[…]

The risks of achievement whoring.

I’ve considered myself an achievement whore the entire time I’ve owned my Xbox 360, and on the whole I enjoy the idea of my wacky gaming adventures being immortalized in a clear-cut number that is exactly equal to the size of my epeen. Just playing a game to completion will usually get you a fair […]

Survivor: Samoa, week one

Survivor’s back! And as far as I’m concerned this season is all about Russell. Or, at least, it will be until Russell is voted off. Which in all likelihood is going to be really, really soon.

First, to avoid confusion, we must clarify: there are two Russells. There’s White Russell and Black Russell. I’m […]