Sorry, I had too much LP work to do to be able to write a real post for today. You’ll be delighted to know, though, that in the course of my work I got mad at ice cream.
You’d think a bowl of delicious vanilla ice cream would be just the thing to take one’s mind off of encoding and uploading videos. And you’d be right! The ice cream was delicious! It was the box that irritated me. I want you to picture the standard ice cream box, the kind you’d find in any grocery store. Chances are you’re thinking of a little cardboard tub with a removable lid or, failing that, a perfectly rectangular box with a flap that opens up on the top. You know, something like this:
Google Image Search found me that box on the FDA recall website, so if you see a box exactly like this you probably shouldn’t eat out of it. Because it’s poisoned, or whatever. But that’s not the point: the point is, the box opens on the top, see? You open it, you get easy access to all the delectable and/or poisonous treats inside.
But the box of vanilla I have in my freezer? It opens from the side. No, not the broad side. The narrow side. The edge, you might call it. The smallest face of the box.
Who designed this friggin’ thing!? I took two scoops out near the top, so I didn’t have trouble with it, but how am I supposed to get the two scoops out of the bottom without sticking my arm all the way in and coming back with vanilla box-slime all up and down it? I mean, once we get passed the halfway point are we supposed to open up the other end of the box?
The whole ordeal left me somewhat discombobulated. I kind of didn’t even want the ice cream, after I scooped it. It’s not our normal brand — lord only knows where Peanut found this monstrosity. But when she gets home, she’s getting an earful.
I’m a man what takes my ice cream very seriously, see. No ill-conceived box will make a mockery of me, no sir.